Sexual Harassment and Assault

by Sako Sefiani

I don’t think anyone is surprised at how prevalent and widespread sexual harassment and assault is among men of all classes and colors. As infuriating as it is to hear about all these affluent and famous men of high status committing sexual harassment and assault against women who aren’t in a position of power as they and don’t have the means or luxury of putting these asshole predators in their place because their career, reputation or dignity is on the line, it’s good to see them at least exposed and sued.

But, what really needs to happen is for them to serve time in jail, instead of paying a sum of money to their victims and walk away to do it again. That’s exactly what Bill O’Reilly of Fox News did each of the seven times he was sued. The situation is not too different from violent and racist police thugs walking away free after committing assault or murder of innocent black men and women.

I already made some enemies with my anti-racist commentaries; so what the hell, let’s lose some more “friends”.

You can unfriend me if:

- You think a woman with “provocative” cloths is “asking for it”, or that she’s “at least partly to blame”, in case of a sexual assault.

- You think there is nothing wrong with commenting on the legs or chest or behind of a woman you’re not romantically involved with.

- You think men making such comments is the same or has the same effect or significance as if it were women making them about a man.

- You think there is something suspicious and unbelievable about women who wait for years before they come forward about past sexual harassment or assault.

- You think as long as there is no physical force, then sexual advances are okay and not a big deal because she can simply say “no” and there is no harm done in proposing.

- You think a “light” touch or a “little” spank on the buttock or an unsolicited shoulder massage is no big deal.

- You think a drunk woman who can hardly walk or stand up is a fair game.

- You think it’s okay to “walk with” a woman that you see walking alone on the street or even suggesting to “walk” her to her home.

- You think because a woman has just spent or has been spending time with you on either dates or otherwise, it’s normal to expect or ask to have sex.

- You think sexism is a two way street and just as women can be subjected to sexism by men, so can men be by women.

This last point will probably draw many objections, just as the point that racism can’t be both ways did on my anti racist posts. But, it’s important to understand that like racism, sexism is unidirectional. In fact, what makes racism racism and distinguishes it from an isolated and individual case of hatred or bias is the fact that only one of the two sides has the institutional, cultural and state power behind it. Since such power is by definition one sided, so is racism and similarly so is also sexism.

Or you can try to learn and understand what makes a person sexist and try not to be one. A good rule of thumb is to consider how you’d like your own mother or sister or wife or daughter to be treated by other men.

13 / 11/ 2017

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